Don’t Water Dead Plants

There was a plant I picked up from the grocery store. It was small, delicate, and had a unique charm because of its hanging veins. Having no pets, I wanted it to bring a little more life into my apartment. It was a house plant chosen to be durable and low maintenance. I didn’t have to water it every day and had to put it out in the sunlight only once and awhile.

I wake up every morning to a lush arrangement of greenery extended out like arms waiting to hug whatever light that hits their leaves. I love the look and feel and I want the best for the plant, so I water it and open a window.

Just like the plant, you decide you like someone and bring them into your life. You make space, do what is needed to tend to their needs, but if you get too comfortable, you slowly stop valuing the things you once fought for. You think, that plant will always be lush, but then you start taking risks.

You start to forget to water it every now and again. It doesn’t die, but maybe a leaf or two turn brown and fall off. You think, maybe thats just its natural growth behavior, but then you neglect it a little more. Now you water it every couple of days and you stop opening the window because you are now too busy.

One morning you wake up and stare at the once lush outstretch plant now wilting to one side and a faded greenish yellow. The soil is dry and the roots are thinning. You pour too much water into it thinking that’ll solve the problem and forget about it for a couple more days. It continues to brown despite you over-watering it. Now a week has gone by and you panic, so you begin to tend to it daily, but the plant has shriveled beyond recovery.

The act of continuing to water a dead plant is the denial phase where you cannot accept the absence of something without acknowledging your own faults. Just like dead plants, watering dead relationships is fruitless and futile and that plant won’t flourish back to what it once was no matter how much care and attention you put towards it.

While it is hard to let go of something that has been around for so long, one should only look at the feelings towards the person and not the habits they have formed. It is one thing to love someone and it is another to have loved someone once.

-Busy Brain